TABLE
OF CONTENTS
To
Be or Not To Be - Paul Nachbar
Picosociety from The Institute (Final Solution) - Paul Nachbar
Tip
for Poetry Revision - Melinda Desir'ee Frye
To
Be or Not To Be - Paul Nachbar
Voice from Outside) To Be or or not Be?
Man. Uh guess it could be a woman, but let's stick with my first
supposition:
Man: To be or not to be? What kind of question is that? Can I just
say here
"I don't know?"
(Silence)
Man: To be or not to be? Well, yes! Or no? Maybe. Sort of. Look,
I gave at the office. Could you please come back next week? Or call
back some time next week?
If I'm not there, you can leave a message on my answering machine
or cell-phone. I guess you know the number. Don't you? Er, don't
you? I guess so.
(Silence)
Man:This is very irritating. Not just on the surface but the ramifications..
give me the creeps here.Well, to be sounds final, but of course
isnt' final
at all. In the long run we're all dead. Didn't somebody big in economics
say
that? I forget who. From a long, long time ago. Well, never mind.
Anybody out there?
(Silence)
Man: Wow. Now I'm getting obsessed lol.Irritating. And damn, I forgot
my pills.
Well, the question makes you think, doesn't it? Hey you out there,
you MADE ME THINK! Isn't that enough?
(Silence)
Man: It doesn't say here, you can be A, B or C..or X, Y or Z. Very
unfair!
It doesn't SAY here, on a scale of 1 to 10, exactly how much do
you want to
be and how much don't you want to be. That is, the question--or
test? Maybe it is a test? Is inherently flawed. It gives you no
margin. Either this or that.
Either left or right. You can't just stay in the center. Or can
you?
(Silence)
Man: Very unfair. And I can't STOP thinking here.It's too difficult.Look,
whoever or whatever YOU are..I also went to a good college. I do
very well
with the Sunday New York Times crossword puzzle. I havent' applied
to play on Jeopardy, but I could. Everybody says I could...and maybe
earn a lot of money too! No, of course I don't get every question
there..Nobody does. I work on
margins..like any rational person. Doesn't that make sense? Or well,
multiple choice questions too..Look I did very well on my SATs.
THEY did not ask you:
To be or not to be?"
(Silence)
Man: To be or not to be..where, when, how, with whom? No, it really
is not
specific enough and I will not think about this any more. To be
or not to be is such a damned general question and every single
psychologist I've ever consulted--not that I have consulted more
than the average number of psychologists that people consult mind
you--has told me to think specifically
and not generally. No, this is too vague..Or perhaps it's too...clear?
Man: To be..To be..what..alive? Obviously, on one level. And not
to be of course being dead.Well, evidently I AM alive here. Everybody
knows that. I know that. You know that. Uh, I have a pulse. I have
blood pressure.I also (walking back and forth) engage in behaviors,
that is I act..Well, obviously. People like me, people have always
liked me. I like me..I guess. Therefore I am. I'm sure I am. I must
be. And therefore I have already answered the question. Very simple
there. Haha. Very loaded.Yet why do I doubt? I HATE doubting...
(Silence)
Man: I am because I act. Well, yes, I also think. But not too much.
Not more than I'm supposed to think.Not more than my peer group.
And we're all very intelligent people here at the firm.Also I feel,
well, something about all of it. Therefore I do act, I do think
and I do feel. No..No. This question does not make me feel too well.
It's not fair.
(Silence)
Man: I was...in the army. They were pretty good to me, though things
were a bit rough. Tough love I guess. It wasnt' always fair. I was
kind of angry, sort of had an attitude. They said that.Most of them
said that. Everybody I knew was in some kind of army because there
is, well, always some kind of war going on.
They said there, and of course I made my cynical jokes at the time,
"Be all you can be:Join the Army". Well yes I was there
and I learned...discipline..and responsibility and reality..and
how to achieve..goals..Whatever. I kept thinking when I was in the
army of this stupid and mean idea for a cartoon I never did: "Be
all you can be" was the slogan and then there was this big
pile of corpses. No I don't want to think about THAT. I never ever
want to think
about that. It's...antisocial..
(Silence)
Man: I did what I was supposed to do. I did what I did not want
to do. I had to do it? Did this mean there was less of me? I don't
know.To be or not to be.
Hell, was any of this really in MY hands? No.No man is an island.
Some poet or rock star said that I dont' remember who.I'm not sure
if that's true or not.
Maybe we are and are not islands. But to be or not to be? Look,
whoever you are, I do my job and you should do yours!
(Silence)
Man: Damn, this question is a plague! I hate this sort of thing.
What was that license plate slogan I read haha: Keep it simple stupid.
This is NOT a simple question...and well I am a simple man. I think.
Ordinary? Nothing horribly different about me? I am a tolerant man
of course. We all are here. And of course, well, people who are
horribly different..well they should just go away, shouldn't they?
They don't belong here with us. US!!!I would not want to enforce
this or anything. I am not a Nazi or anything like that. I just
don't think that "they" should BE...well, here. I should
be here and they should be there. We should agree to disagree. And
never the twain shall meet. Or is it so simple?
(Silence)
Man:No, no, I know I am indulging myself here.Too much time alone
is not a good thing. Everybody tells me that. I'm not a LONER or
anything. I'm a people
person. Always have been, always was.Why can't I just be certain
here. Okay, I made MY decision to be. Maybe not deliberately. Maybe
I am not all that I can be or could be..Maybe, well, this is enough.
I should lower my expectations. Shouldn't I? Fake it until I make
it? Haha..When in Rome live like the Romans. Haha.Smile and the
world smiles with you, cry and you cry alone. Haha.God helps those
who helps themselves. Haha.I think well. Maybe I am just confused
here. I really have nothing original to say. Ah, to be or not to
be. I have nothing original to say on that matter. So, could you
please let me out of here?
(Silence)
Man: Well, everything was perfectly happy and perfectly fine until
YOU asked me this STUPID question.
(Silence)
Man: I don't know who you are but when I find out who you are I
am really going to get my lawyer after you for this one.It is not
fair. You ask me this impossible question and then you don't let
me out of here...wherever...wherever...here is..Where is here anyway?
(Silence)
Man: Damn. I have friends. I have good friends. I have associates.
I have, well, some connections. I'm not like really well-connected
of course or else I probably wouldnt be here. I'd be -I guess- singing
and dancing and having a grand old time with the ones who are, hmm,
well-connected. Shiny happy
people haha..Wherever THEY are. Now if I just call....or I write
an email to...or send a letter to....Well, yes they will help me
with this. And maybe, maybe that fellow with the REALLY high IQ
can help me with this ridiculous question. It does kind of explode
in your mind, doesn't it? Where are you?
(Silence)
Man: Someobody else must know the answer here, the truth, the real
answer, the real thing. I never claimed to be a great mind. I never
claimed to be a great artist or anything like that. Oh I respect
the great minds and the great artists...but they are just not practical
people. Well, I'm not sure if that is true, really, but every single
movie and book and play and article I've read suggests exactly that:
they are not, not a single one of them, practical people. No, not
like us.Us! Us! Not like Us!!! (shouting)
(Silence)
Man: There was an us..there is no us here, is there? How am I to
exist if there is no us? I am not the measure of all things. I am
a component, a part, a piece of something larger than myself..I
can't exist if I am not a component or a part of a piece of something
larger than myself. Nobody can. It's not human. Wow, they won't
believe this at the office..they won't believe any of this at the
office, will they? This strange place and that one question and
my pacing back and forth here like a haha idiot talking out loud
and trying to figure out something as..absurd as this.
(Silence)
Man: The question makes you feel brain-dead. Haha. It melts in the
hand and expodes in your brain. And damn, I have nothing to eat...here..Well,
maybe it is, as they say, an oral fixation..well it could be..though
everybody eats. There is nothing damn it to snack on. I am not used
to this much thinking..without a snack. If none of this was good
enough..why isn't any of this good enough? I am not good enough?
If I were good enough, I would have known the answer here..I am
this that and the next thing and deciding not to be..well,that's
suicidal. It's mentally ill. People like that need...well, help..It's
antisocial. It's barbaric. Ah, this question is SO unfair.
(Silence)
Man: I said "Your question is NOT FAIR!"
(Silence)
Man: The question is not fair because it leads to another question
which leads to another question which leads to another question.
And who the hell wants to question? It's not fun, it's not reassuring,
it does not make me feel..important.No I am not that important a
person of course. I'm not a narcissist or an egomaniac or a megalomaniac.
But why should I feel compelled to think about things which make
me feel even less important than I am? There really should be a
law against this!!
(Silence)
Man: Okay, maybe I wasn't. Maybe I am not. Maybe I am a faker or
a joker.
Or maybe I am just deep down damned ordinary. And who said the world
was difficult for ordinary people?? I don't like my job. I act like
I like my job. Mostly. I don't know anybody who DOES like their
jobs. Ah, well, it's a free country. If you have a job you dont'
like you can either adjust to it or get another job..which you....probably
don't like and adjust to that too. Haha.
Who said life was fair? And anyway, in these times, problems like
this are just...not to be solved by individuals. Maybe in some earlier
era they were..Before think tanks and research teams and computers.And
tons and tons of funding, which I just don't have..I don't read
much of course. Have no time to read much with my job. But maybe
with those quantum computer things..operating at a zillion times
faster than the current computers. THEY could figure it out.
Okay, Sir, whoever you ARE. I just can't answer this one. BUT you
could contact IBM and I'm sure they have a great computer that will
suit you fine!!
(Silence)
Man: This really isn't good for me.This wouldn't be good for anybody.
Now..I've known people who were, like, very religious..They could
answer this question. Hell, they probably wouldn't even ask this
question. Maybe it's their illusion or their delusion or maybe they're
right. I really dont' know.How much of this type of certainty have
I had in my life anyway? How many truly inspired moments? I can
hardly think of any..I know that some of the very religious devote
their whole lives to these contemplations and they, well, find God
or what they think is God..and that's the answer. Or their answer.
Didn't some advice columnist once say that the easiest thing to
do in the world was to deceive oneself? No, no, I do NOT have the
answer here and I feel horrible that I dont' have the answer.Why?
(Silence)
Man: Why ask me this NOW? Everythng was going fine or relatively
okay or maybe it was so-so but who cares? You do what you have to
do. Who the hell said that in this life you could do what you wanted
to do? And besides that HURTS.
You...well, you choose from a menu here, modern-style. Do you want
to be an A, a B or a C. Like voting. You vote for the party of your
choice. Which I might add, WHICH is what makes US free..And party
A has plan A which has it's pros and cons perhaps and party B has
its plan B which has it's pros and cons perhaps..But all of this
is the real world..and hell, what else IS there besides the Real
World? You can't avoid it. You have to deal with it..DEAL
WITH IT.
(Silence)
Man: I never...liked ..dealing with it.I must confess. I dont' know
if anybody is listening. It is really not such a nice place, is
it? No, the world is not such a nice place. It hurts. Of course,
well I am a practical man and I know that not every policy or act
can help everybody without hurting somebody, maybe almost accidentally
or inadvertantly? But who likes complainers??? We don't need any
more whiners and complainers here. Adults who act like infants over
their little gripes. So it's not a perfect world. Well it is getting
better al the time. And maybe the process isnt' always a smooth
one. And maybe some of this is not so nice..No, really really not
so nice..is it?
(Silence)
Man:I was nice....once.Well, they said and always do "nice
guys finish last."
Who the hell wants to finish last? I dont' hate the person who finishes
last.
And damn, there is always going to be somebody who finishes last.
But should I obsess about this? No, you just GO. Who is to say that
this is not enough?
Who could possibly judge me here? That I have not been enough..DO
YOU JUDGE ME??? IS THIS YOUR JUDGMENT OF ME?? WHAT GIVES YOU THE
RIGHT TO JUDGE ME?? I DIDN'T ELECT YOU!!!!
(Silence)
Man: I am really very lonely. I'm bored..I'm stressed outI I can't
really feel much of anything. Deep down. Everybody seems so..prickly..wherever
you go. How can you trust anybody?Of course you can't say these
things to anybody, they'd think you were CRAZY. I never tell anybody
these things. You can't tell anybody THESE THINGS. They'd think
it's a come-on. Well yeah hahah sometimes it is a come-on. Uh, naturally.
Consenting adults and all that stuff. Part of a...free society.
I am really very, very lonely. I work. I talk. I watch television.
Oh yes, well, I read..No, this doesn't seem worth it, does it? Is
any of this worth it? I am so trapped here. And trapped here by
this question. I have all these..things..and ccomplishments..and
well I am very well-liked..and they say I am doing very well..and...and...(sitting
curled up in a ball hands folded tightly)maybe it is all absolutely
nothing..maybe yes..maybe no..I simply...do not know..
Voice: Now you may go...
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Picosociety from The Institute (Final Solution) - Paul Nachbar
One day, not in the very distant future, we will have solved all
of our problems with the human condition. Well, certain problems
at least; others will take longer. It is clear however, that certain
features of Western and other civliizations, including cultural,
which deviate from what is by consensus the normal range of human
emotions (reactions, sensitivity etc), though valuable as expressions
of diversity, whether presently or retrospectively, can now be fully
analyzed in terms of several factors for which contemporary psychiatry
and related professions will provide viable solutions. That is,
it is clear that the unnecessary suffering found in such traditions
as existentialism or the works of Sylvia Plath, Shakespeare, Van
Gogh, Nietzsche and many other writers and artists, politicians,
philosophers etc can now be interpreted as the effects of biochemical
imbalances, dysfunctional families and a collection of genetic illnesses
of one kind or another. Although our free and open society freely
welcomes all criticisms, including that which is perhaps on the
negativistic or overly sensitive side, it is clear to our most avant
garde thinkers that much of this fervor or sturm and drang or even
psouris is due to purely material factors of the brain. resulting
in an increased sensitivity to the very ordinary and inevitable
stresses of the human condition.
The world of course is not a perfect place, nor is psychiatry a
perfect science in any of it's manifestations.Though we are getting
there slowly but surely. One day, of course, through the evolution
of our sciences, it is clear that even the most sensitive and disorganized
souls will benefit greatly , both in their lives and work, from
the
concentrated application of psychopharmaceutical medications, psychotherapy,
cognitive-behaviorism, personality adjustment and of course various
techniques of modern management. Of course, we are speaking of a
minority of dissenting voices, mostly individuals who mean no harm
and who need special care and treatment.
We wish them no harm of course, either in their lives or their personal
work, only serenity, peace, adjustment, maturity and a greater vision
of things, perhaps less self-centered. and narcissistic. And then
we will of course look forward to their increased productivity in
their various job slots as artists, poets etc etc. Which of course
will benefit them financially and emotionally and of course serve
the greater interests of social peace, tranquility, equilibrium,
harmony within individuals and between the various natural groups
which constitute society,general comfort and above all, national
and international security
In God We Trust
The Institute
(Psychiatric Division)
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Tip
for Poetry Revision - Melinda Desir'ee Frye
Hello, everyone! This is a summary I wrote about a magazine article;
some
tips found in the article might be helpful. Best wishes, Melinda
Frye
Article: “Revise your poem but keep your vision”
Author: George Keithley
Publication: The Writer, November 2001
“Revision is essential to publication,” says author Keithley. He
advises
poets to
begin revision by recognizing and preserving what makes their poems
worthwhile and
interesting. When a poem’s essence is kept, a poet may feel more
confident
making
changes in its structure and theme. Revision is paramount to a writer’s
learning process;
we must trust our imaginations and take calculated risks.
Here is a summary of guidelines for poetry revision, given by Keithley:
1. Try to write a complete draft of a poem, pursuing all possibilities.
2. Make every line count; don’t simply use lines as transitions.
3. Speak lines aloud, feeling verbal rhythms. Watch for stagnation
of
repeated lines.
4. Consider eliminating words or lines that don’t contribute to
a poem’s
focus.
5. Or rather than elimination, choose to expand ideas that have
little
development.
6. Identify a poem’s best lines, and use them as a quality standard
for
other lines.
7. Find out which aspect of a poem works best, then consider changing
its
significance.
8. Read poems repeatedly, and question any awkwardness; is eccentricity
helpful or not?
9. Make a poem clear and understandable to readers, without compromising
its
integrity.
10. Strive for consistency and appropriateness. Don’t be self-conscious
about effect.
Keithley states that, “the mystery that moves us in a poem is not
the meaning of
the poem, but how the poem achieves that meaning.” In other words,
subject
is less
important than feeling. A poem’s “music” is found in clarity, economy,
and
appropriate emphasis. Its voice will emerge naturally.
One challenge that poets often have is lack of consistency. Unfortunately,
when this awkwardness is felt, one tends to fall back on “fillers”
to
improve flow. Yet
this article stresses importance of clarity and of economy. It’s
counterproductive to
expound on a particular line or theme in the poem when it doesn’t
belong
there to
begin with. Meaning is found in inspiration, but understanding is
best
found through effort. Keithley’s
article implicitly states that there should be no shame in editing;
in fact,
it can sometimes be a poet’s
moment of truth. Pride has no place in revision.
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